Tag Archive: Spirituality



The Morning Star Rising on the First Day

Read my story by ordering my book, “Possess the Vision”

Review of Prior Postings

In prior postings I have communicated how a life threatening illness sent me to the emergency room near death. My spirit left my body and I experienced the truth of our spiritual reality, of heaven and hell, and the Judgment God.  If you would like to read the details of these postings, please use the following hyperlinks:

The-Initial-Attack

The-Intensive-Care-Unit-and-the-Initial-Prognosis

Entering-the-Spiritual-Realm-of-Death

A-Journey-to-Golgotha

Inside-the-Lake-of-Fire-the-Second-death

Confronting-Satan-in-Hell

Judgment-Day

Reliving-my-sins-before-the-Judgment-Seat-of-Christ

Gods-Question-on-Judgment-Day

Opening-the-Books-on-Judgment-Day

Repentance-Brings-Salvation-Even-on-Judgment-Day

The Last Judgment by Rogier Van Der Weyden

The Last Judgment by Rogier Van Der Weyden

I lived through the Judgment as I made a promise to God to change. I returned to the physical world and underwent several calamities that also brought me close to death. What I did not know was that I was under spiritual attack, an innocent victim of spiritual warfare.

If you would like to read the details of these postings, simply click on the following hyperlinks:

Back-from-Death

The-Physical-Impacts-of-Spiritual-Attack

The-Stench-of-Death

The-Aftershocks-of-Spiritual-Attack

Spiritual-Attack-Brings-a-Hopeless-Outlook

A-Catheter-in-the-Aorta

A-Healing-Miracle-Follows-Meager-Attempt-to-Find-God

Standing-Firm-for-What-God-put-into-my-Heart

The-Spiritual-Attacks-Continue

Spiritual-Warfare-Changes-Everything       

Satan-Calls

In the past few postings I have reveled how much my life has changed since these experiences. It all started when I surrendered to God (I-Finally-Surrender-to-God) and told Him that I would do what ever He wanted me to do. Immediately afterward I have this awe inspiring vision of Jesus filling the earth (Surrender-is-Followed-by-a-Glorious-Vision). The next thing that I knew was that all of my worries about my job were resolved in a miraculous way. Finally, God leads me to the exact place He wants me to go by moving me half way across the country (Gods-Plans-Begin-with-Blessings). All of this leads to an official surrender to God in the church that He led me to.

PUBLICLY COMING TO CHRIST

We started attending this church on a regular basis immediately after this first visit. The pastor would deliver an altar call every Sunday so that everyone would have a chance to give their life to Jesus. Each week, people came to the altar to accept Jesus. For me it was only a few weeks before I was one of many who stepped forward and gave my life to Christ. On the day of my rebirth, I would say that the pastor was flowing in the spirit. He had one hand raised high above his head as he came to me. His eyes were blazing, and he stared directly at me as he shouted praises to God in a very loud voice. I remember thinking to myself—there are twenty people up here—why is he staring at me? Much later he told me that he had sensed a major shift in heaven at the time. Perhaps this referred to the spiritual victory that was achieved by the Lord snatching me right out of the hands of Satan. But the pastor did not know what I had been through because I never told him. Surely God had been communicating with him that day.

SIGNIFICANCE TO THE VISION

The devil kept striking me but I finally surrendered to God. I said that I would do whatever He wanted and He immediately showed me the vision of an earth filled with Jesus blooming into a beautiful ever blooming flower. Then He moved me to a place where I could learn more about the dream and He blessed me all along the way. He drew me to the exact church and ministry where the vision could be found. In return I publicly surrendered my life to Jesus Christ and a major victory was won in the heavenly realm. From this point forward there would begin a steady flow of messages designated to instill in me an understanding of the vision God wanted me to possess. I did not understand much of this yet, and a lot would come later with the writing of my book entitled, “Possess the Vision.” In the next series of postings we will introduce the vision statement and how my spiritual experience and scriptures help to form its foundation.

Read my story by ordering my book, “Possess the Vision”


The Morning Star Rising on the First Day

Review of Prior Postings

In prior postings I have communicated how a life threatening illness sent me to the emergency room near death. My spirit left my body and I experienced the truth of our spiritual reality, of heaven and hell, and the Judgment God. 

If you would like to read the details of these postings, please use the following hyperlinks:

The-Initial-Attack

The-Intensive-Care-Unit-and-the-Initial-Prognosis

Entering-the-Spiritual-Realm-of-Death

A-Journey-to-Golgotha

Inside-the-Lake-of-Fire-the-Second-death

Confronting-Satan-in-Hell

Judgment-Day

Reliving-my-sins-before-the-Judgment-Seat-of-Christ

Gods-Question-on-Judgment-Day

Opening-the-Books-on-Judgment-Day

Repentance-Brings-Salvation-Even-on-Judgment-Day

The Last Judgment by Michelangelo

 I lived through the Judgment as I made a promise to God to change. I returned to the physical world and underwent several calamities that also brought me close to death. What I did not know was that I was under spiritual attack, an innocent victim of spiritual warfare.

If you would like to read the details of these postings, simply click on the following hyperlinks:

 Back-from-Death

The-Physical-Impacts-of-Spiritual-Attack

The-Stench-of-Death

The-Aftershocks-of-Spiritual-Attack

Spiritual-Attack-Brings-a-Hopeless-Outlook

A-Catheter-in-the-Aorta

A-Healing-Miracle-Follows-Meager-Attempt-to-Find-God

Standing-Firm-for-What-God-put-into-my-Heart

The-Spiritual-Attacks-Continue

Spiritual-Warfare-Changes-Everything       

Satan-Calls

Seek God and He Will Lead You to Find Him

In the past few postings my life has changed significantly. It all started when I surrendered to God (I-Finally-Surrender-to-God) and told Him that I would do what ever He wanted me to do. Immediately afterward I have this awe inspiring vision of Jesus filling the earth (Surrender-is-Followed-by-a-Glorious-Vision). The next thing that I knew was that all of my worries about my job were resolved in a miraculous way. I got a job offer in California with a substantial raise, while at the same time accepted an early retirement program from my current employer that included a year’s salary, medical benefits and flight privileges for life (Gods-Plans-Begin-with-Blessings).

 So we moved to California not realizing that it was God pulling all the strings for us. We soon moved into a new apartment and shortly afterward had a visit from our daughter who had just graduated from college and had the summer off. One day, I came home from work and found the two of them in the living room talking about God. They were laughing and having a great time but for some reason, I could not relate to what they were saying. Then for some unknown reason I blurted out, “I don’t know what it is that the two of you have, but I want it!” They just stared at me in a daze, seemingly totally surprised at what I had just said. Now this was the second time that I had verbally exercised my need for God. I should have known that He would honor my request.

 One evening not long after, I was in the loft trying to find something to watch on television and was rapidly flipping through the channels. I flipped right past this man in a white suit who was talking about God. Something about what he said in that half second caught my attention. By the time that it hit me, I had already flipped down three additional channels. So, I flipped back to hear more and the more the man talked, the more I liked what he had to say. I called my wife into the room, and she liked him as well. More interesting, he was going to be at a church near Los Angeles, California that week. We did not know anything about this church but were excited about what we heard. So, we decided to see this man in person. I had never before attended a charismatic church service and was not sure what to expect. Apparently, this pastor was famous and he demonstrated signs and wonders in his ministry.

We had to drive half way across Los Angeles to get to this church which was approximately fifty minutes away from where we lived. When we got there, we had to wait in a line that wrapped all the way around this very large church building. Everyone was talking about this man’s visit. They made it seem like a really big deal. We hurriedly grabbed a seat to the side of the choir. The service started with music and song. They had an excellent musical group and a large choir. They played and sang the loudest church music I had ever heard. In addition, all the songs were new to me. Everyone else seemed to know the words by heart. I noticed that people were raising their hands while singing. They were praising God so I decided to join them by raising my arms as well. I was trying very hard to get connected with God.

 Then a minister came out to lead the people in prayer. I remember hearing the people next to me pray in a language that I thought was Latin, and I wondered what this might mean. I thought that perhaps they were foreigners. But then, they spoke such good English prior to the service. This is extremely strange, I thought.

Then the visiting evangelist came out, dressed in a white suit. He started to preach and after the message, led the people in praising God with music and song. This continued for some time. The program slowly progressed into spiritual praise and worship. Then suddenly and without any warning, he coiled his right arm all the way around to the left side of his body. Then he swung it back around, past the audience in front of him, and across his right side. The momentum then extended it back toward the choir behind him while he shouted, “Choir, receive your anointing.” To my amazement, the entire choir that had been standing behind him fell to their chairs in unison. I couldn’t believe my eyes. This was astounding. They fell as if they were an integrated unit. They fell in such precision. It appeared as if someone had released a trap door where they were standing. I remember thinking that this could not be faked. It was executed so perfectly. Even if they had practiced for months, they would not have been able to achieve this degree of synchronization.

 But even more importantly, we were hit by it as well. No, I did not fall to my seat along with the choir but I got hit with what seemed to me to be a bolt of electricity that ignited my heart. Because of its impact I had to catch my breath. This powerful charge to my heart started a pleasant warming sensation that lasted for the rest of the church service. I did not know what was going on inside my body, but there was something real working in my heart.

 I then looked all around the church to see what was going on around me. I saw people down in their seats in all sections of the building. It would seem that they also had been affected as I had. There was no doubt that God was working at this church. I was really searching God, and I found Him that night. I had said that I wanted Him in my life and He led me to the place where I could do so. He had taken us to where He wanted us to go. He blessed us for earnestly seeking Him and the blessings were not to going to stop. Just like the ever blooming flower in the vision that He showed me, the goodness of God goes on forever.


The Morning Star Rising on the First Day

Review of Prior Postings

In prior postings I have communicated how a life threatening illness sent me to the emergency room near death. My spirit left my body and I experienced the truth of our spiritual reality, of heaven and hell, and the Judgment God. 

The Judgment Seat of Christ 

If you would like to read the details of these postings, please use the following hyperlinks:

 

The-Initial-Attack

The-Intensive-Care-Unit-and-the-Initial-Prognosis

Entering-the-Spiritual-Realm-of-Death

A-Journey-to-Golgotha

Inside-the-Lake-of-Fire-the-Second-death

Confronting-Satan-in-Hell

Judgment-Day

Reliving-my-sins-before-the-Judgment-Seat-of-Christ

Gods-Question-on-Judgment-Day

Opening-the-Books-on-Judgment-Day

Repentance-Brings-Salvation-Even-on-Judgment-Day 

 I lived through the Judgment as I made a promise to God to change. I returned to the physical world and underwent several calamities that also brought me close to death. What I did not know was that I was under spiritual attack, an innocent victim of spiritual warfare.

 If you would like to read the details of these postings, simply click on the following hyperlinks:

 Back-from-Death

The-Physical-Impacts-of-Spiritual-Attack

The-Stench-of-Death

The-Aftershocks-of-Spiritual-Attack

Spiritual-Attack-Brings-a-Hopeless-Outlook

A-Catheter-in-the-Aorta

A-Healing-Miracle-Follows-Meager-Attempt-to-Find-God

Standing-Firm-for-What-God-put-into-my-Heart

The-Spiritual-Attacks-Continue

Spiritual-Warfare-Changes-Everything       

Satan-Calls

 The past three postings address my surrender to God, (I-Finally-Surrender-to-God) and the beautiful vision of the world to come (Surrender-is-Followed-by-a-Glorious-Vision) and my dramatically changed (Gods-Plans-Begin-with-Blessings.)

GOD’S PLAN BEGINS WITH BLESSINGS

The vision that I saw that night was an experience of an eternity. But morning came and it was back to the reality of everyday life. I had not escaped the job problems that, in retrospect, I really brought upon myself. I received the poorest job performance review of my career and while it was quite unfair, I expected it. I had a big mouth and told the truth once too often. Shortly after the performance review, my boss called me into his office. He told me that I did not have what it took to be a manager. As a result he urged me to take a downgrade to a technical position. I coldly refused. I figured it was just a trick to get me into something that I could not handle. Granted, my performance review was less than an average, but it certainly did not communicate incompetence. Therefore, it could not be used as grounds for a demotion. In addition, I had more than ten years of great reviews which certainly would support my case.

 

But, there was no misunderstanding that this guy was out to get me by hook or by crook. As fate would have it, an opportunity was soon to come his way. Revenue of the business had become very poor. The economy had taken a nosedive. As a result, the management team requested that the IT department take an across-the-board headcount reduction. This was music to my boss’ ears. It was evident that he planned to surplus my job and cut me in the ensuing reduction in force initiative. In the meantime, the company decided to offer employees an attractive severance package. This meant that you could voluntarily leave the company and still receive retirement benefits. To qualify, you had to be near retirement age and have twenty or more years of service. I qualified for the twenty years of service rule. But, I would not meet the age requirement until my next birthday. The package was nothing more than a special early retirement offering. It included health insurance benefits until age sixty-five. In addition, since I worked for an airline, my wife and I would also receive retiree flight benefits for life. On top of all this, they would give me a year’s salary as a severance. This was a great package, if I could only get a waiver on the age requirement. I talked with the personnel department and was successful in getting a time bridge on my retirement date to my birthday. They decided to allow me to take a management leave of absence until that date. My boss had a different idea though. He tried to get me fired just a month prior to my eligibility for the retirement package. My response was to tell the personnel department that I planned to file an age discrimination suit if I was denied the package we discussed.

 

They understood my point of view and the ultimate consequence completely. Despite all of this, my boss was successful in eliminating my position in his department. He told personnel that he had no work for me, and that I should be terminated immediately. I had heard through the grapevine that the two departments were battling each other behind closed doors over the issue.

 

One day out of nowhere I was notified that a director that I had previously worked for was offering me an open managerial slot to enable me to work until I qualified for the severance package. I did not realize it at the time, but God was there again taking care of me just like all of the other times. Again, I thought that I had received a lucky break. What I certainly did not know was that this was just the start of God’s plan for me. I had promised to do whatever He wanted. Now, He was going to take action. He was going to lead me directly to where He wanted me to go, and what He wanted me to do. In addition, He was going to shower me with blessings and favor everywhere I went. This was just the start of the new life that God had in store for me. God was going to make my world blossom, just like in the vision.

 

I realized the first part of God’s program when the early retirement package was awarded. The next step was finding gainful employment, so I started looking around for another job.

Surprisingly, a very well know Entertainment Company in Burbank, CA sought me out. It is a long story, but my resume coincidentally just showed up there. They wanted to hire me over the phone. I couldn’t believe it. Even though anyone else would jump at a chance like this, I was cautious. I asked them to fly me out for an interview. They really wanted to hire me right away, but I was still several weeks away from completing the time element for the retirement package. Again, I had good fortune shining on me. They decided to wait for me to become available so that I would have no gap in employment.

So, we moved to California for a thirty percent raise. I also had a retirement package in my pocket that would start to produce income in five years, and I had medical and air travel benefits. In addition, I had a severance check for one year’s salary. We moved into a nice apartment in the town of Santa Monica, California, just three blocks from the ocean. It was just the place to enjoy beautiful views of both the ocean and the mountains from our deck. What a change of events. Not bad for someone who was still clueless about what God intended to do. He was putting everything in place. Unknowingly, I just went with the flow.


The Morning Star Rising on the First Day

Surrender is Followed by a Glorious Vision

Shortly after my surrender to God in the hallway of my home something amazing happened that was to signal a vastly different future for me. It happened as I was in bed. I was in that twilight place halfway between sleep and consciousness that I had a most beautiful vision. I will make an attempt to adequately describe what I experienced, even though I am sure that no description could ever live up to what I saw. None the less I will make an attempt to do so here:

 

The first thing that I saw was a bright florescent orange globe that appeared against a steel blue-black background.

The colors were sharp and crisp, and they emitted light from within somehow. The image was clearer and sharper that anything I had ever seen in my life. From time to time it seemed that knowledge about what I was watching would enter my head. In this regard I knew that the orange globe represented the earth. Despite this knowledge the sphere was one solid color and did not contain any visible signs of continents or oceans.

 

Then an object appeared at the geographic most Northern point of the sphere. The object had the shape of an Indian arrowhead. It was black, pointed on one end and had a short tail on the opposite end. In addition, it was very smooth and flat on the surface.

I thought of it as being a shuttle for some reason.

 

The shuttle started moving due south, leaving behind a thin black line at its trail. It traveled directly to where the South Pole is found and it disappeared, leaving a perfectly straight black line connecting the North and South Poles. It was a line that dissected the globe into two halves. I continued to watch as the shuttle reappeared at the North Pole again. This time it was on a different longitude track, drawing another black line across the face of the orange globe. I watched as it slowly traveled across the great face of this huge globe, seemingly inch by inch. I continued watching for quite a long time as several new lines were drawn over the face of the globe to the left and right of the original north/south line. The new lines were drawn in sets. Each line of a set was of equal distance from the original center line. When the shuttle had completed its vertical slicing, the shape of the globe resembled a peeled orange. All of the lines ran through both the North and South Poles. I was overwhelmed with the beauty of it all.

 

But, the shuttle had not completed its work. It reappeared at the eastern side of the ball’s equator and circled the globe several times until all of the latitudes were completed. I gazed upon the orange globe, now marked with horizontal and vertical lines. As I was marveling at its beauty, the orange skin started to peel away at the North Pole. Specifically, one of the orange-slice-shaped pieces curled back into a tightly wadded roll. This section rolled back until it passed the equator line. It stopped curling and looked like a tightly wound scroll. Then, one at a time, the rest of the orange slices performed the same curling process and each achieved the same result. This process revealed a pink layer that was previously hidden underneath the orange skin. The smooth, pink surface turned out to be the petals of a flower that was about to bloom. The tightly wrapped flower petals started to grow and mature. As they did, beautiful pink flower petals began to unravel. The flower continued to grow, and the petals continued to open up into a mature state. Next, the fully mature flower continued to produce new petals at its center, which is the equivalent of the North Pole point of the globe.

 

As the newly formed petals grew to maturity, they migrated to the outside to make room for new growth. Eventually the petals at the outside edge ran over the edge of the globe. They would hang down in a long stream of petals that somehow remained attached to the flower. The process continued and the train of pink flower petals continued to grow longer as well. I just watched in amazement, awestruck with the beauty of all of this. Then, somehow it dawned on me that this process was infinite. It would have no end. It would go on like this forever.

 

As I continued to watch this spectacular show, I wondered what would happen if I opened my eyes. Was it possible that I could be dreaming all of this? So, I opened my eyes and lifted my head in an effort to look around the room. To my astonishment, the vision continued even with my eyes wide open. Moreover, I could also see my dresser and the walls of the bedroom through the transparent-like vision of the flower. I did not understand how this could happen, but I did not want to miss any part of the dream. So, I quickly closed my eyes again to focus on whatever else might happen. However, I couldn’t help but wonder again about why this was happening to me. Why should I know this? What significance is this to me?

 

I am not exactly sure what happened next. Either the globe moved, or I moved. Perhaps it was a combination of both. Whatever occurred, it caused my perspective relative to the flower to change by ninety degrees. Initially, I was gazing at the flower from a point approximately even with the equator. When the movement was completed, I was gazing down on it from a point directly above the North Pole. To be more exact, I was directly above the precise center of the budding flower. While I was considering this in my mind, an opening appeared in the center of the flower, and I was drawn into it as if pulled by a magnet.

 

Once inside, I found myself at the feet of Jesus. This Jesus was not the same size as the man who once walked upon the earth. Rather, He filled the earth from pole to pole. His giant feet were planted at the North Pole. His head towered to the South Pole. He was dressed in a long white robe. I attempted to see His face, but the distance was further than I could clearly see. I was able to examine His arms, however, as they were outstretched to each side like the statue in Brazil.

It was as though He was administering a blessing to the people of the world.

 

The vision was beautiful in every way. It was more real than any of the experiences in this life. Interestingly, it occurred within days of my surrender. I did not know it then, but God was there once again. He had shown me the big picture or the end state. He had revealed His plan for me by showing me the vision. I was about to enter a world that would bud into a beautiful flower. This world would blossom forever because Jesus was at the center of it. In addition, this vision was not for me alone, but rather, for everyone who places Jesus at the center of their world. For them it is prophetic of God’s blessings that are to come upon His people. It is a picture of peace, well being, love, and relationship with the Father that God gave me to communicate to you. It is a promise of spiritual victory over evil right here on earth. It ultimately is a fulfillment of the Lord’s Prayer that proclaims:

 

In this manner, therefore, pray: Our Father in heaven, hallowed be Your name. Your kingdom come. Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven (Matthew 6:9 – 10).

 

Therefore, the victory is in our hands. For God’s kingdom to come to earth, His will must first be done here on earth, just as it is being done in heaven. What a wonderful end-state it is! The inspiration to write my book, Possess the Vision, is founded on a world filled with Jesus at the center. As you will soon find out, God was about to bring me into a world filled with Jesus right here on earth.

Review of Prior Postings

For people interested in gaining insight into the context of this experience to everything else that was happening to me at that time, the following section is provided as an index to my postings about them.

In prior postings I have communicated how a life threatening illness sent me to the emergency room near death. My spirit left my body and I experienced the truth of our spiritual reality, of heaven and hell, and the Judgment God. 

The Judgment Seat of Christ 

If you would like to read the details of these postings, please use the following hyperlinks:

 The-Initial-Attack

The-Intensive-Care-Unit-and-the-Initial-Prognosis

Entering-the-Spiritual-Realm-of-Death

A-Journey-to-Golgotha

Inside-the-Lake-of-Fire-the-Second-death

Confronting-Satan-in-Hell

Judgment-Day

Reliving-my-sins-before-the-Judgment-Seat-of-Christ

Gods-Question-on-Judgment-Day

Opening-the-Books-on-Judgment-Day

Repentance-Brings-Salvation-Even-on-Judgment-Day 

 I lived through the Judgment as I made a promise to God to change. I returned to the physical world and underwent several calamities that also brought me close to death. What I did not know was that I was under spiritual attack, an innocent victim of spiritual warfare.

 If you would like to read the details of these postings, simply click on the following hyperlinks:

 Back-from-Death

The-Physical-Impacts-of-Spiritual-Attack

The-Stench-of-Death

The-Aftershocks-of-Spiritual-Attack

Spiritual-Attack-Brings-a-Hopeless-Outlook

A-Catheter-in-the-Aorta

A-Healing-Miracle-Follows-Meager-Attempt-to-Find-God

Standing-Firm-for-What-God-put-into-my-Heart

The-Spiritual-Attacks-Continue

Spiritual-Warfare-Changes-Everything       

Satan-Calls

 The past three postings address my surrender to God, (I-Finally-Surrender-to-God) and the beautiful vision of the world to come (Surrender-is-Followed-by-a-Glorious-Vision) and my dramatically changed (Gods-Plans-Begin-with-Blessings.)


The Morning Star Rising on the First Day

Review of Prior Postings

In prior postings I have communicated how a life threatening illness sent me to the emergency room near death. My spirit left my body and I experienced the truth of our spiritual reality, of heaven and hell, and the Judgment God. 

The Judgment Seat of Christ 

If you would like to read the details of these postings, please use the following hyperlinks:

 

The-Initial-Attack

The-Intensive-Care-Unit-and-the-Initial-Prognosis

Entering-the-Spiritual-Realm-of-Death

A-Journey-to-Golgotha

Inside-the-Lake-of-Fire-the-Second-death

Confronting-Satan-in-Hell

Judgment-Day

Reliving-my-sins-before-the-Judgment-Seat-of-Christ

Gods-Question-on-Judgment-Day

Opening-the-Books-on-Judgment-Day

Repentance-Brings-Salvation-Even-on-Judgment-Day 

 I lived through the Judgment as I made a promise to God to change. I returned to the physical world and underwent several calamities that also brought me close to death. What I did not know was that I was under spiritual attack, an innocent victim of spiritual warfare.

 If you would like to read the details of these postings, simply click on the following hyperlinks:

 Back-from-Death

The-Physical-Impacts-of-Spiritual-Attack

The-Stench-of-Death

The-Aftershocks-of-Spiritual-Attack

Spiritual-Attack-Brings-a-Hopeless-Outlook

A-Catheter-in-the-Aorta

A-Healing-Miracle-Follows-Meager-Attempt-to-Find-God

Standing-Firm-for-What-God-put-into-my-Heart

The-Spiritual-Attacks-Continue

Spiritual-Warfare-Changes-Everything       

Satan-Calls

 The past three postings address my surrender to God, (I-Finally-Surrender-to-God) and the beautiful vision of the world to come (Surrender-is-Followed-by-a-Glorious-Vision) and my dramatically changed (Gods-Plans-Begin-with-Blessings.)

I Finally Surrender to God

In a series of prior postings I have communicated how a life threatening illness sent me to the emergency room where the doctors did not expect me to live through the night. Being close to death, my spirit left my body and I experienced the truth of our spiritual reality. I traveled to and swam in the Lake of Fire (also called the second death) where I experienced unimaginable horrors. I then went into Hell where I was confronted by Satan and experienced the incredible hatred that he has for me. Next I traveled to the Judgment Seat of Christ and heard the words from God that no one wants to hear, which were, “Why should you live?”

 

The Last Judgment by Rogier Van Der Weyden

 But I made a promise to God that I would be better if He would work with me. The next thing that I knew was that I woke up in the intensive care center. I had lived through the night but what was about to become clear was that the battle for my life was not over. My problem was an exploding pancreas was filling my body with powerful digestive enzymes capable of decomposing the internal organs of my body. So in effect, my body was disintegrating from the inside out. To slow down enzyme production I was placed on a strict fast until such time as a more definitive direction could be made. Then suddenly my vocal cords became swollen and choked off my air supply and an emergency operation was performed that saved my life. Another operation was performed to insure that I had proper levels of nutrition entering my body. Then I was beset by a series of traumatic attacks of a mysterious infection that took me to the brink of death on three separate occasions. Not realizing that I was under spiritual attack my troubles continued. Here is what happened next.

My health continued to improve slowly and I eventually started working full time again. Soon afterwards I transferred to our Dallas/ Fort Worth location. So there were some good things happening, but it was a mixed bag at the same time. Just after we moved to Texas, my dad died after being sick for over a year with a heart condition. I loved him very much and In losing my dad, I lost the one person in this world who truly believed in me. I miss him still. In the meantime, I was having work-related problems. There had been a departmental reorganization at work and I found myself working for someone who had very different ideas than I did. As time went on, the situation became more and more unbearable and I became increasingly unhappy. One night after my wife was in bed, I walked the hallway thinking about the possibility of being out of work. There had been some rumors about a reduction in staffing levels coming down the pike. My disagreements on the direction of the department would make me an easy target if such a reduction in force were to take place. I thought about how hard it would be to find another job in the current down economy. What bothered me more than anything was the thought about how I was letting my family down.

 

This was a breaking point for me. I just could not handle all the turmoil in my life anymore. As I walked back and forth down the hallway of my home I became emotionally upset and I finally gave up on the idea that I could do it all on my own. I lost my balance and fell against the wall on my left side crying. Then I blurted out, “Okay God, I give up. I will do whatever You want me to do.” Those words came from my heart.

 

I did not realize it then, but this surrender was the start of wonderful changes. Things would continue to get worse for a while, but now God was going to show me that He had a new direction and a new strategy for my life. Big changes were in store for me, whether I knew it or not. I was about to move into the realm of God’s will. In addition, I was about to learn how God leads and works with His people in this world. I was about to experience the blessings and favor that He bestows on those who faithfully follow and love Him.

 

The Transfigured Jesus With Moses And Elijah

 

 

Most importantly, I was about to see the manifestation of the power and glory of God. I was now headed directly toward a relationship with the one and only God. From this point forward I would be changed forever, never to be my former self again—never wanting to go back, never looking back, and all the while discovering that I had received the most tremendous blessing possible. I had been saved from the horrible fate that I had chosen for myself and had been placed on a pathway that leads to the glory of God (notice the pathway carved out of the earth below, the one that leads to the glory of God.)

 

The Morning Star Rising on the First Day

 


The Morning Star Rising on the First Day

Read the truly amazing life story about how the forces of good and evil battle over a man and the vision that God gives him. Joseph W. Gordon’s Possess the Vision (Xulon Press, $12.95, 140 pages, ISBN 1-59781-205-6) tells about the mysterious spiritual experiences that occur throughout his lifetime.

SATAN CALLS

In a series of prior postings I have communicated how a life threatening illness sent me to the emergency room where the doctors did not expect me to live through the night. Being close to death, my spirit left my body and I experienced the truth of our spiritual reality. I traveled to and swam in the Lake of Fire (also called the second death) where I experienced unimaginable horrors. I then went into Hell where I was confronted by Satan and experienced the incredible hatred that he has for me. Next I traveled to the Judgment Seat of Christ and heard the words from God that no one wants to hear, which were, “Why should you live?”

If you would like to read the details of all of this please use the following hyperlinks:

The-Initial-Attack

The-Intensive-Care-Unit-and-the-Initial-Prognosis

Entering-the-Spiritual-Realm-of-Death

A-Journey-to-Golgotha

Inside-the-Lake-of-Fire-the-Second-death

Confronting-Satan-in-Hell

Judgment-Day

Reliving-my-sins-before-the-Judgment-Seat-of-Christ

Gods-Question-on-Judgment-Day

Opening-the-Books-on-Judgment-Day

Repentance-Brings-Salvation-Even-on-Judgment-Day

The Last Judgment by Michelangelo

But I made a promise to God that I would be better if He would work with me. The next thing that I knew was that I woke up in the intensive care center. I had lived through the night but what was about to become clear was that the battle for my life was not over. My problem was an exploding pancreas was filling my body with powerful digestive enzymes capable of decomposing the internal organs of my body. So in effect, my body was disintegrating from the inside out. To slow down enzyme production I was placed on a strict fast until such time as a more definitive direction could be made. Then suddenly my vocal cords became swollen and choked off my air supply and an emergency operation was performed that saved my life. Another operation was performed to insure that I had proper levels of nutrition entering my body. Then I was beset by a series of traumatic attacks of a mysterious infection that took me to the brink of death on three separate occasions. I still did not realize that I was under a spiritual attack and as a result the attacks continued. Just to be sure that there was no mistake about what was happening, Satan himself was about to let me know what the source of my future troubles was. Here is what happened.

One day I was alone in my apartment and the phone rang. I picked it up and the voice at the other end said, “This is Satan.” The voice was not that of a human. It sounded like something from a science fiction movie. It was loud and somewhat garbled. I would define it as metallic sounding—computer generated. There were several distinct threads to the voice, and each was at a different octave. It was like several people were all saying the same thing at the same time but not totally synchronized. That gave the cumulative voice a garbled effect. Based on my experience in hell, you can imagine what I must have been thinking. I was scared out of my wits. Trembling and in a panic, I hung up. I thought that there must be some explanation. This must be a prank of some kind. Perhaps someone was having some fun with me—using some sort of electronic mechanism. But who would do such a thing? I tried to put it out of my mind. Again, I rationalized it away. Maybe it was just a prankster who called the wrong number.

I was rocked again a few days later when the same thing happened. But this harassment wasn’t over yet. Things were about to get even weirder. I had contemplated moving to another city and was looking for new job opportunities. I looked in the National Business Employment Weekly newspaper one day, and found a job ad that looked promising. So, I called the number listed; a voice answered the phone and said, “This is Satan.” It was the same garbled voice again. I said, “What?” I was hoping I had not heard correctly. “This is Satan,” the voice replied. My heart was pounding as I crashed the receiver down. How in the world could this be? No one I knew could have done anything like this. How could this be? Sometimes you just don’t want to see the handwriting on the wall. I called again, thinking I had gotten the wrong number or something. The same thing happened. I never called again. I was terrified.

Satan had not given up. He was still coming after me. But at the time all of this was a mystery to me. I was a blind man walking in a mine field, ready to be victimized once again by the evil forces that exist and flourish against the good people of this world who do not seek God. So, even though I still did not realize it, more attacks were on the way.

If Satan is attempting to destroy your life also, then turn to Jesus for help. Invite Him into your life. Say the following words: Jesus I need you. I invite you into my life. I ask for your forgiveness for all of the wrong doings of my life, especially those when I turned my back on you. I now seek to conform my life to your will and to be the person you want me to be. I now therefore reject Satan and all the works of the devil. I reject the glamor of this world and seek the love of God in my life. Sweet Jesus be my protector, my salvation and my leader toward a new life. I ask this in the name of Jesus the Christ of Nazareth.

Jesus is Tempted on the Mountain

To start you on your new road toward God, seek to find Him through scripture reading and prayer. Find a quiet time to read and meditate. Start with the book of John reading for 15 to 20 minutes. Then stop and ask God to explain these scriptures to you. Compare the deeds of your life to those of the stories you read. Ask God to reveal and help you rectify any discrepancy. Put all of your troubles behind you. Give them to Jesus and ask Him to carry them for you. Seek God in the quiet. Don’t worry about talking but rater seek to hear in the quiet. Try to continuously pull yourself toward God in the spiritual realm. Seek the assistance of the Holy Spirit in all of the above. Remember, Jesus has been victorious over the devil.

Read the truly amazing life story about how the forces of good and evil battle over a man and the vision that God gives him. Joseph W. Gordon’s Possess the Vision (Xulon Press, $12.95, 140 pages, ISBN 1-59781-205-6) tells about the mysterious spiritual experiences that occur throughout his lifetime.


The Morning Star Rising on the First Day

Read my story by ordering my book, “Possess the Vision”

The Spiritual Attacks Continue

 

In a series of prior postings I have communicated how a life threatening illness sent me to the emergency room where the doctors did not expect me to live through the night. Being close to death, my spirit left my body and I experienced the truth of our spiritual reality. I traveled to and swam in the Lake of Fire (also called the second death) where I experienced unimaginable horrors. I then went into Hell where I was confronted by Satan and experienced the incredible hatred that he has for me. Next I traveled to the Judgment Seat of Christ and heard the words from God that no one wants to hear, which were, “Why should you live?”

If you would like to read the details of all of this please use the following hyperlinks:

The-Initial-Attack

The-Intensive-Care-Unit-and-the-Initial-Prognosis

Entering-the-Spiritual-Realm-of-Death

A-Journey-to-Golgotha

Inside-the-Lake-of-Fire-the-Second-death

Confronting-Satan-in-Hell

Judgment-Day

Reliving-my-sins-before-the-Judgment-Seat-of-Christ

Gods-Question-on-Judgment-Day

Opening-the-Books-on-Judgment-Day

Repentance-Brings-Salvation-Even-on-Judgment-Day

The Last Judgment by Michelangelo

But I made a promise to God that I would be better if He would work with me. The next thing that I knew was that I woke up in the intensive care center. I had lived through the night but what was about to become clear was that the battle for my life was not over. My problem was an exploding pancreas was filling my body with powerful digestive enzymes capable of decomposing the internal organs of my body. So in effect, my body was disintegrating from the inside out. To slow down enzyme production I was placed on a strict fast until such time as a more definitive direction could be made. Then suddenly my vocal cords became swollen and choked off my air supply and an emergency operation was performed that saved my life. Another operation was performed to insure that I had proper levels of nutrition entering my body. Then my doctors wanted to perform an unnecessary operation but I refused after getting a second opinion. I still did not realize that I was under a spiritual attack and as a result the attacks continued. The remaining portion of this posting will address a series of these attacks that had my doctor’s baffled.

 

Going Home

As the second opinion predicted, I started to feel much better and was getting stronger. However, I was still having some problems with food digestion and as a result, had to stay on aortal IV feedings. I no longer had to nap several times a day my weight was holding steady and with more time on my hands, I walked the halls of the hospital out of boredom.

My family doctors thought that now I was out of serious trouble and since the IVs could be administered at home, I could be released and placed me on home care.

The home care package provided everything that I had previously been getting at the hospital. A refrigerator was delivered to my house to keep the IV solutions fresh. The solutions were delivered weekly, and a delivery schedule was established to ensure that I did not run out of supplies. They sent a person to instruct me how to do all of the IV set up work; I became responsible for doing all of my own IV setups. This meant I had to ensure that the IV was hooked to my catheter properly each day at the appropriate times. In addition, the home care plan required frequent checkups at my family doctor’s office to ensure that things were progressing normally.

The Spiritual Attacks Come Suddenly

For the first couple of weeks, things went well. Then one day for no apparent reason, I suffered what I would describe as a severe cold chill with uncontrollable shivers. During this episode my body shivered and convulsed for approximately ten minutes. The coldness I felt could not be remedied with blankets, and I became so cold that even my lips turned blue. Then, suddenly these chills ran their course and stopped just as suddenly as they had started.

I went directly to the hospital where they performed a series of tests. I talked to the doctors directly, and they were baffled. I was concerned, and so I made sure that the doctors knew the history of my illness and the home care IVs that I was currently receiving.

They told me that it was probably nothing, and I should not worry about it. I remember thinking as I left the hospital that perhaps there was something wrong with my home care process. After all, what else could it be? But they were paid top dollars to find problems with people. After all, they are doctors. They surely would have been able to figure this out. They are professionals. They know what they are doing, right?

About a week to ten days later, just when I started to think that the doctors were right, the chills hit me again, only much worse this time. I am not sure how long they lasted but when they stopped I was exhausted. This was a very serious setback in my way of thinking.

After the episode settled down, I mustered up the strength to go to the hospital again. A more exhaustive set of tests was performed but the results were the same. They found nothing wrong and sent me home. Yes, again I made sure that they knew all of the circumstances of my illness and my current home care treatment. Apparently, they could not put the pieces together. They indicated that if they could see me when I was having an episode, they might be able to identify the cause of these mysterious shivers and convulsions.

After another week I went to my family doctor for my biweekly check up. It was there that the third episode occurred. It started while I was seated on the table and the doctor was examining me. I started shivering, and the nurses covered me with blankets but with no effect. I looked in the office mirror and could see my lips turning blue. This time the convulsions were much more violent, and my fingers and toes went numb as well. The muscles of my body were cramping and becoming fatigued. In the midst of all of this thrashing, my doctor decided to check my heart beat with his stethoscope. As he listened, I could feel the abnormal rhythm of the heartbeat in my chest, and I knew that he was hearing it also. I looked at his face and saw it turn white as he listened to my arrhythmia. I looked into his wide-open eyes and saw pure fear in them. I knew that he thought I could die in his office. I thought that his reaction was an indication of the seriousness of the situation. I knew that I was sick enough to die. But I again refused to let negative thoughts into my mind regardless of my circumstances. Just like before, I knew that I would be fine.

My body started shaking even more violently. One nurse covered me with her body to provide additional warmth. Then the ambulance arrived, and I was wheeled out through the patient waiting room. I got to see, first hand, the horror and disgust on the faces of the people as I was wheeled past them. I guess they also thought I was a goner! Just as in the other two episodes, the violent shaking suddenly stopped in the ambulance. This time they must have come to the conclusion that there was something wrong with my catheter. It was removed as a precautionary measure. Later, tests confirmed their suspicions. A strand of staph infection was growing on the end of the catheter tube.

According to the doctor, the growth caused a chain of infectious materials that lengthened as time passed. Once it reached a critical length, the strand would break off and be released instantaneously into my heart. This is what caused the violent reactions.

I did not know it at the time but I was in spiritual warfare, and the enemy continued to pound me because I did not seek the protection of God. One purpose to these communications is to inform the reader about the reality of such warfare and attacks. If you feel that you have been a victim seek God’s help immediately.

 

Read my story by ordering my book, “Possess the Vision”

 


The Morning Star Rising on the First Day

Read my story by ordering my book, “Possess the Vision”

STANDING FIRM FOR WHAT GOD PUT INTO MY HEART

In a series of prior postings I have communicated how a life threatening illness sent me to the emergency room where the doctors did not expect me to live through the night. Being close to death, my spirit left my body and I experienced the truth of our spiritual reality. I traveled to and swam in the Lake of Fire (also called the second death) where I experienced unimaginable horrors. I then went into Hell where I was confronted by Satan and experienced the incredible hatred that he has for me. Next I traveled to the Judgment Seat of Christ and heard the words from God that no one wants to hear, which were, “Why should you live?”

The Last Judgment by Rogier Van Der Weyden

The Last Judgment by Rogier Van Der Weyden

If you would like to read the details of all of this please use the following hyperlinks:

The-Initial-Attack

The-Intensive-Care-Unit-and-the-Initial-Prognosis

Entering-the-Spiritual-Realm-of-Death

A-Journey-to-Golgotha

Inside-the-Lake-of-Fire-the-Second-death

Confronting-Satan-in-Hell

Judgment-Day

Reliving-my-sins-before-the-Judgment-Seat-of-Christ

Gods-Question-on-Judgment-Day

Opening-the-Books-on-Judgment-Day

Repentance-Brings-Salvation-Even-on-Judgment-Day

But I made a promise to God that I would be better if He would work with me. The next thing that I knew was that I woke up in the intensive care center. I had lived through the night but what was about to become clear was that the battle for my life was not over. My problem was an exploding pancreas was filling my body with powerful digestive enzymes capable of decomposing the internal organs of my body. So in effect, my body was disintegrating from the inside out. To slow down enzyme production I was placed on a strict fast until such time as a more definitive direction could be made. Then suddenly my vocal cords became swollen and choked off my air supply and an emergency operation was performed that saved my life. Another operation was performed to insure that I had proper levels of nutrition entering my body. Next my doctors wanted to perform an operation to repair my broken pancreas. But a second opinion told another story and set off another battle for my life. Here is the rest of the story.

 

The good news of the second opinion was forwarded to the hospital staff, and I was not surprised that they totally disagreed with it. Nor was I surprised when the hospital surgeon warned me that I would experience serious consequences if I did not have the operation. The use of the word “would,” was definitely deployed to strike fear and doubt into my mind. Perhaps they really believed what they were saying. Or, perhaps they just wanted to save face. The thought in my mind at that time was, “surgeons only make the big money when they operate.”

But this was a full assault and as I was soon to find out, they were my immediate family members as well. It wasn’t very long before they were also trying to persuade me to go forward with the operation as well. After all, they were fearful of losing me.

I knew in my heart from the very beginning that I would live. I must have picked up this positive attitude simply by making it through the first night. I, therefore, rejected the bad report and never, ever entertained it in my mind or heart. You see, I had believed in a good report even before there was a good report to believe. In my heart, I knew that I did not need the operation, and I told the hospital doctors and everyone else who came to see me.

This was not faith on my part but rather a knowing. I told them that I would not have the operation. Many people tried to change my mind but I told them that I would not. The doctors tried several different strategies to get me to recant. My answer was always unwavering and to the point. Unfortunately, they pressed me to the point that I had to rudely tell them that this was the end of the line and that there would be not be any more discussion about the operation.

Interestingly enough, by chance I ran into this surgeon on an airport shuttle bus several years later. I was in much better health at the time and was in very good shape and had lost a lot of weight because I had been playing quite a lot of racquetball. Because of this he must not have recognized me, so I introduced myself. Would you believe that he started preaching to me about the operation again? I guess he just did not get the message. He refused to believe the test results that showed that the pseudo-cysts had disappeared. There was nothing left on which to operate! Interesting, isn’t it.

This is how it is with the unbelieving. They see with their eyes, but their minds don’t comprehend. They hear with their ears, but they don’t understand the truth.

It has been twenty-five years since all of this happened and, thank God, there have never been any repercussions from my decision at that time. Sometimes you just have to go with the message that God has put in your heart despite all of the negatives going on around you.


Read my story by ordering my book, “Possess the Vision”

 


 



The Morning Star Rising on the First Day

Read my story by ordering my book, “Possess the Vision”

A HEALING MIRACLE FOLOWS MEAGER ATTEMPT TO FIND GOD

In a series of prior postings I have communicated how a life threatening illness sent me to the emergency room where the doctors did not expect me to live through the night. Being close to death, my spirit left my body and I experienced the truth of our spiritual reality. I traveled to and swam in the Lake of Fire (also called the second death) where I experienced unimaginable horrors. I then went into Hell where I was confronted by Satan and experienced the incredible hatred that he has for me. Next I traveled to the Judgment Seat of Christ and heard the words from God that no one wants to hear, which were, “Why should you live?”

If you would like to read the details of all of this please use the following hyperlinks:

The-Initial-Attack

The-Intensive-Care-Unit-and-the-Initial-Prognosis

Entering-the-Spiritual-Realm-of-Death

A-Journey-to-Golgotha

Inside-the-Lake-of-Fire-the-Second-death

Confronting-Satan-in-Hell

Judgment-Day

Reliving-my-sins-before-the-Judgment-Seat-of-Christ

Gods-Question-on-Judgment-Day

Opening-the-Books-on-Judgment-Day

Repentance-Brings-Salvation-Even-on-Judgment-Day

The Last Judgment by Rogier Van Der Weyden

But I made a promise to God that I would be better if He would work with me. The next thing that I knew was that I woke up in the intensive care center. I had lived through the night but what was about to become clear was that the battle for my life was not over. My problem was an exploding pancreas was filling my body with digestive enzymes that are used to decompose meat. So in effect, my body was disintegrating from the inside out. To slow down enzyme production I was placed on a strict fast until such time as a more definitive direction could be made. Then suddenly my vocal cords became swollen and choked off my air supply and an emergency operation was performed that saved my life. Another operation was performed to insure that I had proper levels of nutrition entering my body. But there still was no answer to what to do about my broken pancreas.

 

Then, for some reason I picked up a Bible one day. I had never read it before but since I had the time I thought that perhaps it would be as good a time as any. I was still in the hospital and was tired most of the time. I would often read just a few chapters at a time because even reading tired me. I started by reading the book of Matthew and hung in there until I eventually finished the entire book. I read the words but for what ever reason, they did not hit home. I remember thinking that they did not seem to make any sense. They left me feeling flat. The book of Matthew seemed like a series of nice stories—not much more. I wondered why anyone would get so excited about these simple stories. After finishing Matthew, I continued reading but after a while I gave up. The Bible just did not make much of an impression on me. Little did I know at the time that God would honor my meager attempt to find Him. The following paragraphs tell the story of what happened shortly afterward.

A HEALING MIRACLE

Jesus Heals the Leper

After being in the hospital for a couple of months, my surgeon came to talk to me. This was shortly after I had a second set of CAT scan examination performed. These examinations were performed to look at my pancreas and to determine weather it has healing or if I would need an operation.  My doctor communicated that the pseudo cysts on my pancreas were not being reabsorbed. This meant that I would need surgery to correct this condition. He also said that in the short term they posed little risk because the pseudo cyst tissues were soft. Over time they would harden and be in danger of breaking. Therefore, he indicated that it would be very dangerous to leave these pseudo cysts in their current condition.

He provided me with a long list of reasons why my condition was dangerous and recommended a pancreas operation when I got stronger. When I inquired about the risks of the operation he explained that the procedure would be very complex and risky. They would have to make a fifteen-inch cut in my abdomen and physically remove my stomach, kidneys and much of my intestines just to get to the pancreas. All of this would be necessary because the pancreas is located just inside the backbone and it is inaccessible from the back.

Once the internal organs were out of the way, the pseudo cysts would be lanced and then sewn to the wall of the intestines. This procedure would enable the pseudo-cysts to drain directly into the intestines where the powerful enzymes excreted by the pancreas would not be harmful. Once this phase of the operation was complete, they would replace the removed organs and stitch me up.

The surgeon again admitted that this procedure was classified as extremely risky. On the other hand, he believed that the risk was warranted as he was sure that I would have major, potentially fatal, problems without it.

But the complexity and risk of this operation seemed excessive to me. After all, I had believed from the very first day that I would recover and that everything would be fine. In fact, during my hospitalization I refused to let any negative thoughts into my mind. Bad news from the surgeon was not going to change my mind about the overall outcome. It seemed to me that the risk of the surgery was greater than the potential problem with my pancreas. The surgery just seemed intrinsically wrong. It felt wrong in my head and wrong in my gut.

Members of my immediate family thought otherwise however. They certainly knew much better than I just how lucky I was to be alive (since the doctors told them that I would not live through the first night but chose to keep me in the dark.) After discussing this situation with them, I decided to get a second opinion. So, I contacted my family doctor to see if he could help.

He did some research and found a very experienced pancreatic specialist who was assigned to another hospital in town. Little did I know what a firestorm would be started by bringing in a doctor from another hospital. Apparently, this kind of thing was just not done. My viewpoint was that I did not understand why anyone would want to do it any other way. I already knew that the other doctors in the hospital would agree with their cohort’s opinion. What I needed was a fresh set of eyes, an open and independent mind, and an environment free from political influence. My family doctor did an excellent job playing the middleman in making it happen. He pulled strings to get the independent second opinion set up.

The day that the doctor from the other hospital showed up, I could hear the nurses and the doctors talking about it in the halls. In fact, it seemed that everyone in the building was talking about it. With all the fuss you would have thought that someone had robbed a bank. In any event, the new doctor showed up and did an excellent job. He asked me a lot of questions, examined me, reviewed my records, and ordered a completely new battery of tests including CAT scans, X-rays, and blood tests. A few weeks later he reported his analysis of the new tests, and the results were shocking. He reported that the pseudo-cysts were shrinking! That meant that I would not need this very dangerous operation.

By comparing the two sets of CAT scans, he was able to report that the pseudo-cysts were smaller than before, which meant that they were being reabsorbed into my pancreas. He projected that within three to six months time that they would be gone completely. My body was being healing! This was great news.

However, I did not give God any of the credit at the time. I thought that it was my good positive attitude, a strong body, and good luck. It was quite a bit later in my life that I came to know the love of Jesus that I truly understood what really happened. When I look back at this event now it is as clear as crystal that God intervened. Something happened between my first and second battery of tests, and that something was that I had tried to find God by picking up a Bible and reading it. Regardless of how feeble the effort was, God responded with a healing miracle! It did not even matter that I found the experience empty; God honored my search for Him. It was as if God was saying to me, “Okay son, you took one step in My direction, and you think that nothing will come of it. But, you have My heart. I am going to show you that I am real. My desire is that you live.”

Jesus "The Life," Raises Lazarus from the Grave

Interestingly, I did not even ask for healing but simply reached out to try to find Him. Sweet God in heaven, I praise Your holy and sacred name. I praise You for loving someone unworthy of Your love. Someone who could never change the error of his ways without Your love.

As you can see, God was there again. He was looking out for me and taking care of me even when I did not know it. I think about these things now and wonder why the Lord would love me so. He has saved me from the lake of fire and brimstone, from the pit of hell and the savagery of the devil. He has given me life even though I stood before Him on the Day of Judgment with the stains of sin all over me.

But the battle was not over. The second opinion was not received well by all of the members of my immediate family. In addition, it was not received well by the hospital doctors either. In my next posting I will tell how they both tried to get me to have the operation anyway.

 

Read the truly amazing life story about how the forces of good and evil battle over a man and the vision that God gives him. Joseph W. Gordon’s Possess the Vision (Xulon Press, $12.95, 140 pages, ISBN 1-59781-205-6) tells about the mysterious spiritual experiences that occur throughout his lifetime.

 


 

The Morning Star Rising on the First Day

Read the truly amazing life story about how the forces of good and evil battle over a man and the vision that God gives him. Joseph W. Gordon’s Possess the Vision (Xulon Press, $12.95, 140 pages, ISBN 1-59781-205-6) tells about the mysterious spiritual experiences that occur throughout his lifetime.

A CATHETER IN THE AORTA

In a series of prior postings I have communicated how a life threatening illness sent me to the emergency room where the doctors did not expect me to live through the night. Being close to death, my spirit left my body and I experienced the truth of our spiritual reality. I traveled to and swam in the Lake of Fire (also called the second death) where I experienced unimaginable horrors. I then went into Hell where I was confronted by Satan and experienced the incredible hatred that he has for me. Next I traveled to the Judgment Seat of Christ and heard the words from God that no one wants to hear, which were, “Why should you live?”

The Last Judgment

If you would like to read the details of all of this please use the following hyperlinks:

The-Initial-Attack

The-Intensive-Care-Unit-and-the-Initial-Prognosis

Entering-the-Spiritual-Realm-of-Death

A-Journey-to-Golgotha

Inside-the-Lake-of-Fire-the-Second-death

Confronting-Satan-in-Hell

Judgment-Day

Reliving-my-sins-before-the-Judgment-Seat-of-Christ

Gods-Question-on-Judgment-Day

Opening-the-Books-on-Judgment-Day

Repentance-Brings-Salvation-Even-on-Judgment-Day

 

The Book of Life

But I made a promise to God that I would be better if He would work with me. The next thing that I knew was that I woke up in the intensive care center. I had lived through the night but what was about to become clear was that the battle for my life was not over. My problem was an exploding pancreas was filling my body with digestive enzymes that are used to decompose meat. So in effect, my body was disintegrating from the inside out. To slow down enzyme production I was placed on a strict fast until such time as a more definitive direction could be made. Then suddenly my vocal cords became swollen and choked off my air supply and an emergency operation was performed that saved my life.

But now the emerging problem was how to get adequate levels of nutrition into my system. The doctors had tried several times to reintroduce me to food but each time they did my digestive enzyme levels shot up, causing damage to my internal organs. In addition the nurses were having an increasingly difficult time finding a usable vein each time they had to connect me to IV nutrition. Since the larger veins had already broken down, only the smaller veins were available. Of course, using smaller veins reduced the amount of nutrition that could be pumped into my system each day. Since I was already getting IV solutions almost twenty hours a day, this was a critical situation. After a lot of agonizing my doctors finally decided to risk placing a semi-permanent catheter into my aorta.

That’s correct, right through the middle of my chest and very close to my heart. They were hesitant to perform this procedure because a single slip during the procedure could cause permanent heart damage.

But there were several advantages to having it done. First of all my veins would get a needed rest and the problem of nutritional volume would be solved. Once the catheter was in place, all I needed to do was attach it to an IV for just four hours a day to get all the nutrition that I needed. Things would became much easier and totally pain free. An added benefit would be that I would be able to get up and move around more often since I would not need to be permanently connected to an IV.

They performed the procedure in my hospital room and I was conscious during the entire operation so that the doctors could talk with me. They opened a small hole in my chest by going between two of my ribs. Once this was done they had enough room to insert the catheter. As fate would have it, the doctor had a great deal of difficulty getting the catheter to penetrate my very strong aorta wall. The doctor made several unsuccessful attempts to force the catheter into the artery. Each attempt was accompanied with additional force and before the procedure was completed, the doctor was using all of his strength and much of his body weight to get the catheter inserted. At the time that all of this happened I was very concerned. It seemed that all I could think about was their warnings of the risk of heart damage from an inadvertent slippage. But there was no slip as the catheter finally punctured the aorta wall, making a sound like the crushing of a giant beetle’s shell as it entered. The good news was that the operation was a success. There were no slips, thank God. I was very happy and relieved that this entire ordeal was over.

Keep in mind that a permanent solution to my condition had not been devised and that the spiritual attacks on me were far from over. For now I was content but at the same time I felt a need to find God. Look to the next posting to find out what God does in reaction to my feeble attempt to find Him.

Read the truly amazing life story about how the forces of good and evil battle over a man and the vision that God gives him. Joseph W. Gordon’s Possess the Vision (Xulon Press, $12.95, 140 pages, ISBN 1-59781-205-6) tells about the mysterious spiritual experiences that occur throughout his lifetime.